Shadow of the Colossus

Game 12 - City Park


Results:
A.J. - 2 (Game Winner, Big Winner)
Rob -2 (Game Winner, Poison Wicket Kill)
Carly - 1 (GW)
Phillips -1 (GW)



Standings:
A.J. - 14
Mikey L. - 5
John S. - 5
Boyd - 5
Josh- 5
Poops - 4
Kelly - 4
Carly- 3
Red - 3
Mike G. - 3
Eric - 3
Temuchin - 2
Zach - 2
Dave Simpkins - 2
Ricky - 2
Rob - 2
Frankie - 2
Kevin - 1
Jess - 1
Julie - 1
Doug - 1
Melonie - 1
Martin - 1
Tim - 1
Jody - 1
Geoff - 1
Deme - 1
Dave Bergonz - 1


--------------------------------------------


No excuse for last week's blog (see below), even though I was up to my neck in drunk celebrities, sandy beaches and nerd,I abandoned this post to ruin. Epic fail okay? I admit I'm powerless over alcohol and my life has become unmanageable. 20 Hail Mary's and so forth. Are we good? Moving on:




A.J. won.


But you already knew I was going to write that didn't you? Even before you arrived at City Park you already knew what was going to happen. Already, I can see the chain reaction - the chemical precursors that signal the onset of an emotion, designed specifically to overwhelm logic and reason - an emotion that is already blinding you from the simple and obvious truth. He is going to win and there is nothing you can do to stop it.


But who needs to win a fancy trophy anyway? Sure we have a better shot at landing the girl-unal on the moon then catching up to A.J. but we can still have fun, right? Guys?
Like Snail Races! You weren't expecting those were you? Props to Carly for the slimy drag race.


Highlights!


-Snail Races! We can set up odds for over and unders next game, see your bookie.


-Rob getting his first points in style with a Poison Wicket Kill on Martin AND winning his game. Cheers.


-Vivian belting out "Me So Hungry!"







Alright, no riddle this week. The test will be if you can actually find the park. I'm not sure of the name but I have zeroed in on a location. Call Doug or Boyd or Eric for more instructions, here is a link: http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&ie=UTF8&ll=39.731663,-105.041399&spn=0.011139,0.016329&z=16
We're either playing at Lakewood Gulch or Martinez park.
See you there.

UPDATED!!! Turns out it will be Lakewood Gulch.





Meanwhile, miles away in another part of the country....


NERDS!

Spartans! Tonight, we dine, at Chilli's!

Okay, ignore the guy dressed as Thor for a second and look at the guy on his right, tell me that guy doesn't look like a Mexican Chris Brunn.

Edward James Olmos grubbin'

This thing is even creepier in real life.

This is what happens when you don't shower and shave for a week at Comic-Con

This is the only pic of Marika and I together. I'm on the right.

Kratos, the all-mighty warrior, takes a break decapitating demons and slicing through Spartans to hold his wife's purse while she goes potty.

If it's going to be that kind of party I'm gonna stick my tongue in Pimp Darth Vader's Ear!

Worst. Blog. Ever.

Game 11- Richard Hart Estate

Results:
Josh- 2 (Game Winner, Big Winner)
Kelly - 2 (GW, PWK)
Poops - 1 (GW)
Deme- 1(GW)
Dave B. - 1(PWK)

Standings:
A.J. - 12
Mike L. - 5
John S. - 5
Boyd - 5
Josh- 5
Poops - 4
Kelly - 4
Red - 3
Mike G. - 3
Eric - 3
Temuchin - 2
Zach - 2
Carly- 2
Dave - 2
Ricky - 2
Kevin - 1
Jess - 1
Frankie - 1
Julie - 1
Doug - 1
Melonie - 1
Martin - 1
Tim - 1
Jody - 1
Geoff - 1
Deme - 1
Dave B. - 1

Berserkeley!

Game 10 - Berkeley Park


Results:
Ricky - 2 (Game Winner, Big Winner)
Boyd - 2 (GW, Poison Wicket Kill)
Geoff - 1 (GW)
Dave S. - 1 (GW)
John S. - 1 (PWK)
A.J. - 1 (PWK)


Standings:
A.J. - 12
Mike L. - 5
John S. - 5
Boyd - 5
Red - 3
Josh - 3
Poops - 3
Mike G. - 3
Eric - 3
Temuchin - 2
Zach - 2
Carly- 2
Kelly - 2
Dave - 2
Ricky - 2
Kevin - 1
Jess - 1
Frankie - 1
Julie - 1
Doug - 1
Melonie - 1
Martin - 1
Tim - 1
Jody - 1
Geoff - 1
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Another week, another late blog!

Officially, the season is halfway over. (Unofficially, if we go over 20 games, which is a possibility.)
Chris Brunn suggested a lawn chair, spray painted in gold, upon which A.J. can sit rex gloriae and watch us peasants scavenge for the scraps of points that fall from his lofty table.

Looking at the points I notice four maybe five players with the right idea of ascension and perhaps out of the four/five, One can open the Matrix and light our darkest hour.

Berkeley was awash in beautiful weather and tranquility. It felt we were operating a speakeasy or a secret meeting. This is the natural rise and fall of things. Last week was a massive turnout. This week can be described as just a notch above intimate. I'm not complaining. Just saying. Point being, we were done by sundown, Ricky managed his first point and just to make it interesting decided to win the poison battle as well. Boyd played strong to claim 2 points and tie with Mikey L. and John for second place.
But according to a late added 11th commandment, A.J. must be awarded at least one point in every game. Only kidding, he got a poison wicket kill.



Instead of highlights this week, I thought I'd present this slide show.

Jess, looking due west, probably with the 50th state on her mind. Or just talking to Boyd, can't tell which.



Games already in progress.




Dude, the sky.




A.J. watches with pure contempt before he transformed back into a large semi and drove over Dave's bike and Frankie.



A long first half of the season begins to take it's toll.





Dave's riddle on the agreed upon place (agreed upon by Ricky and Ricky only) is a short but sweet:

This ain't no mere park, this here's an estate.The name's even classy, that's why we hyphenate.
It's also the site, where Boyd got halfway before several people, had started to play.


Sunday's on the phone to Monday, Tuesday's on the phone to me, oh yeah...

The Citrus Deathstar Strikes Back

Game -9 McDonough Park


Results:
A.J. - 2 (Game Winner, Big Winner)
John S. - 1 (GW)
Mikey L. - 1 (GW)
Tim - 1 (GW)
Jody - 1 (GW)

Standings:
A.J. - 11
Mike L. - 5
John S. - 4
Red - 3
Josh - 3
Poops - 3
Mike G. - 3
Boyd - 3
Eric - 3
Temuchin - 2
Zach - 2
Carly- 2
Kelly - 2
Kevin - 1
Jess - 1
Frankie - 1
Julie - 1
Dave - 1
Doug - 1
Melonie - 1
Martin - 1
Tim - 1
Jody - 1

--------------------------
Causality Loop

A.J. continues to dominate. Last Tuesday was no exception. A.J. won, again - Is he secretly setting himself up to become the greatest NSCC player who ever lived? Can you argue with the stats? Is it true if he finishes as the Champion he'll want that Bronze Statue?

So there was a little controversy regarding cheating and the cheating cheaters who cheat -

As it is, I'm not here to play judge, jury, or executioner, nor do I think this is the proper venue to single out those who cheat.
I'd rather just report on great big fun happy things! Like a guy using the girl-inal and being proud of it - SEE BELOW.

Lets just remember we're all here to have fun. The only thing we can do, which is the only thing we've ever done is play by the honor system, until those big fat sponsorship checks start rolling in and we can hire referees.

Besides, if there is cheating going on ya'll suck at it, cause A.J. is still winning.

Highlights!
-Large turnout. No rain plus plenty of shade and beer for all.

-Chris Brunn Returns. And he brought the Citrus Deathstar out of retirement.

-Phil pissing in the girl-inal. How is there no picture of this? Phil even flashed a big Cheshire grin to everyone who dared look over and laugh.

- I can't recall any more highlights, I was pretty drunk towards the end of my game, which probably contributed to my losing said game.

Lowlights!
- Strip Frisbee. Three douche bags playing Frisbee with no shirts.

Dave A.K.A The North Side Riddler was apprehended this week by the dynamic duo, but fear not true believers, because something tells me Dave has not teased his last twister of a brain-twister!

Anyway we're playing at Berkley, under the promenade, by the tennis courts.
Shit, you know where!


"Shorty, now you sounded so fine, give me your number we can bocce all night, playing croquet till the morning lie-EE-ight"

Ever Valiant

Game 8 - Sloans Lake

Results:
Boyd - 2 (Game Winner, Big Winner)

Eric - 1 (GW)

A.J. - 1 (GW)

Mikey L. - 1 (GW)

John S. - 1 (GW)

Martin - 1 (PWK)

Standings:

A.J. - 9

Mike L. - 4
Red - 3
Josh - 3
Poops - 3
Mike G. - 3

John S. - 3

Boyd - 3

Eric - 3
Temuchin - 2
Zach - 2
Carly- 2
Kelly - 2
Kevin - 1
Jess - 1
Frankie - 1
Julie - 1
Dave - 1
Doug - 1
Melonie - 1

Martin - 1

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No excuse. The long weekend laid a mesmerizing melody on my mind and all responsibilities along with this blog were Pied Pipered away. But I've emerged from my gelatinous cocoon, a little sticky, naked, and for some reason clutching a pink plastic flamingo, but no worse for wear and ready with alacrity to report on our previous croquet match.

So, uh, does anyone remember anything funny or interesting that happened? I heard Jermaine Jackson died. Anything else?

Oh! Shockingly A.J. didn't win. But the Force is strong in that family and Boyd picked up the slack to win the day.

Highlights!

- Martin, way to go with getting your first point of the season unfortunately it came at a price: he poison wicket killed his own girlfriend for it. Ouch.

- Some of you might've spotted our special guest rolling around, the guy in the wheelchair with the laptop, everyone lets hear it for Stephen Hawking! And even though Mr. Hawking can't actually play with us, he was able to calculate who the winner would be. He also discovered what A.J.'s weakness was but before he could tell me, a large portal of energy opened up behind him and he was sucked through the vortex. Good luck!

- Carly's stupendous 8 wicket run.

- Shane made Sonia drop her ice cream. Why or how he did this I was not told. But John bought Shane an ice cream, then knocked it out of his hand before he could take a bite. Because no one messes with a Simpkins woman. Apparently.

- Ed's nonsense advice to Eric on which ball he should hit during the poison battle. Nonsense because - A. He was telling Eric which ball color was which. B. It was DARK. C. Oh yeah, Ed is COLORBLIND!!!

- There was a tournament about a week ago. It was ravenously documented by Mike and Jess so wait for the premier for highlights. Jake won. Phil was 2nd. And Dave got his money back. Here is a picture:

Shane In Ear Shot - "I thought I smelled pussy." (upon seeing Dom)

The Prince Of Puzzlers, The Count Of Conundrums: Dave and this weeks riddle:

Who knew about the Scotsman,
around the North side?
Maybe they don't show,
the same kind of pride?
But this park and it's sister,
southern by 10 blocks,
seem to be in tribute,
to the land o' the lochs.

Stuck between two saints,
Catherine and Clair.
Don't blink when you drive past,
you might not see it's there.
And If you're out cruisin',
On a Saturday night,
pass El Forastero,
and then take a right.

Everybody's working for next Tuesday...